Dear NYC School District,

My name is Brazen.

I applied with your school district back in January. In the days of my youth (read: High School) I dreamed of working in your glorious town. As I grew older the allure of your tall glittering buildings and swanky people, faded somewhat. The reality of 1600 dollar rent to live in a closet, while breathing the most polluted air in the United States, seemed less appealing than it had when I was 16.. But what the hey right? I figured the universe would lead me where I should be if I put some feelers out in all directions.

Somewhere in or around March you created a new website. This was to make applying for a position "easier." I was sent an email requesting that I create a profile and apply again. I did this happily- although I admit your application process is a rather tedious one.

A few days later I was contacted by an actual person. I was so excited. They requested a copy of my teaching license. I spent 10 dollars at Kinkos- wow! They sure take advantage of the scanner-less population. I sent you a pdf copy of my license. Surely I thought- I would get a phone call soon.

But four months passed and I heard nothing. I received mass emails directing me to your website where I could search for job postings. But I must admit, following the obscure directions on your site was tedious. Alot of work, for not very much reward, if you would like my honest opinion. I decided a relationship between you and I just wasn't meant to be.

And now here we are, three weeks before I am about to start my school year in lovely Ohio.

Hark! Is that an email in my inbox? Why it is...

An invitation to a job fair... in FOUR days.

I understand that organizing these types of functions must be a bit overwhelming. As I grow older (and presumably wiser) I have discovered that districts hire teachers as late in the summer as possible. Watching the newbies scramble to set up their classrooms and find an apartment in three days must be amusing, if not wholly miraculous.

But I digress. For here I am on my last day of vacation in North Carolina. As my family and I head back to Ohio this afternoon- I realize that once again a relationship between you and I can never be. And I feel let down. Should you organize your Blackberry a little better next time, perhaps I could have more than 24 hours to rustle up the some 300 dollars in gas and hotel money that I will need to make the trip. Not to mention planning how I will navigate your public transportation system, and locate LaGuardia High School- in one of the largest school districts, in one of the largest cities- in the world.

Just a thought.

Sincerely,

This Brazen Teacher